God, Where Were You?

While I was reading the Devotional "Grieving the Child I never knew" there was one particular entry that stood out to me the most.  It was on the story of Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead.  I have always loved this story in the Bible as there is so much to learn from it.  For those of you who may not be familiar with the Story found in John 11, Lazarus was very sick and he had 2 sisters, Mary and Martha. Verse 5 says,  "Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus, so when he heard that Lazarus was ill, he stayed 2 days longer."  Say what?  Jesus seems to ignore Mary and Martha's plea for help and stayed 2 days without going to see Lazarus.  We then find out that Lazarus did indeed die and had been in the tomb 4 days by the time Jesus came to see him.  The first thing Martha said was, "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died."  Then in verse 32  Mary fell at Jesus's feet and said "Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died." Of course, that's not the end of the story.  Jesus then goes to the tomb and says to Martha "Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?"  He then says to God in verse 42,  "I knew that you always hear me, but I said this on account of the people standing around, that they may believe that you sent me."   He then raises Lazarus from the dead!  The reason?  For His Glory!

Have any of you been in a situation where you cried out to God, "Lord were are (were) you??"  A time where you ask God to come near, but He kept you waiting and wondering? I know I have recently...twice. The day before our 1st baby died, I knew that it was possible I was miscarrying.  I prayed and cried out to God all day long to please heal and save our baby.  During my 2nd pregnancy, I knew for 2 weeks that our baby wasn't doing well and that I may miscarry again.  2 weeks of crying out to God.  2 weeks of sadness, hope, frustration, disappointment, faith, and all different emotions.  I cried and prayed for the Lord to perform a miracle.  Throughout this difficult time, I had thoughts of "Lord, where were you? You had the power to save our baby.  Why did you allow me to be pregnant twice, when you would take them both away from me? Why didn't you answer my prayer?"   The reason?  For His Glory!

I felt that I could totally relate to Mary and Martha in the scriptures when they cried out to Jesus "if only you would have been here".  They know Jesus was more than able to save Lazarus and heal him. They also knew that Jesus loved them.  And when the sisters asked Jesus for help, Jesus chose to wait.  He chose not to respond.  They probably couldn't understand why He hadn't at least acknowledged their request. They may have felt abandoned at a time when they needed Jesus most.  Was he being cruel to them?  Absolutely not.  He was waiting to respond until Lazarus was dead so that God could be glorified in a greater way (John 11:4)

The Lord had not responded in the way I had asked or wanted and I realize that is a part of the Christian life.  God's plan is so much better than ours, even when we don't understand it.  Just because He didn't respond in the way and timing that I expected, it doesn't mean He has abandoned me, or doesn't care. 
As a strong believer in the sovereignty of God, I knew His plan was good and perfect for me.  And it is only by Faith and God's grace that I can continue to press on and trust in Him.  Perhaps God just wants me to learn to trust Him through the silence.  He wants to reveal Himself to me in a different way.  I'm learning to listen and to wait.  I'm praying that the Lord would use me to comfort others who go through this pain.  I know without a doubt this pain is for His glory. 

When Lazarus died, Mary and Martha were devastated.  But then Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead.  And through that, many Jews who had come with Mary and had seen what Jesus did, believed in him (John 11:45).  My study Bible points out that John did not record Lazarus's reaction or any of the aftermath of his raising, except for the fact that many Jews believed in him as a result of seeing this miracle.   It's so simple...the focus is on Jesus, not Lazarus.  I pray that the focus of our pain would be on Jesus. 

***sidenote:  I have a lot more to say about this passage, so I decided to break it up into 2 parts...since this is already way too long and no one likes to read long blog posts!  ***